I'm a Greek girl dating a non-Greek and I wanted to hear from people about what they think the pros and cons are. He's a great guy but there are so many differences sometimes I'm not sure if it will work out. Anybody out there experience is before? How did you work it out or did it end your relationship?
When you date xenni Maria , you always go through the Greek 101 stage teaching them our culture. after a while i get sick and tired of the whole routine and move on . alot of it comes down to religion if the other person is willing to convert to become Greek Orthodox unless you are willing to change your religious beliefs for that person[ which i would never do] . alot of Greek girls date xenni guys and try to make them Greek. Today in 2010 many Greek girls date Mavros like Kim Kardashian does. the bottom line is how much are you willing to sacrifice to make it work and what are you getting in return for your sacrifices ? In Ft. Lauderdale Fla St Detmetrios Greek Orthodox Church 80% of the marriages are interfaith. it doesn't mean that they work out in the long run. Best of Luck to you. Ilias
Depending on His nationality, this can and maybe be an issue, not to mention his religion with your parents, whether they are from the old school so to speak.
I have seen my sister go through all the issues in this same senario, be very careful in what you say and to whom. this can be taken personnal at a latter stage in life believe you me, without even blinking an eye lid.
You created it you have to deal with it, you can't blame anyone, you need to take responsibility for your own actions, its your call.
Is it Love or Lust,
I would like to suggest this is what you yourself need to define.
If your not sure, step back for a moment and have a real good think.
If your are true to your heart and this is what you want and need, then go ahead however as previously mentioned you created it you have to deal with it...............sorry for repeating myself you need to understand this clearly and be honest with your decision with no comprimising.
Your Parents will bend over backwards to support you all the way, to make the Xenni as VGG calls them as part of the family more so than your brothers and sisters if you have any that are already married to other Greeks.
Especially your mother because your her daughter, as they both will not want to get embarressed in hear the gossip from other people as to what went wrong within relationship latter on down the track.
If you decide to go down this road no doubt as the years go by you will find that the so called family (Brothers and Sisters) will be at a distance and the unfortunately your parents will notice this as well.Both sides of our parents went down that track, and to be honest they do not feel comfortable being in their presence, becuase you will see they will put a front on when the Xenni Outlaws are present.
my wife and eye would look at each other and say WTF.
Last but not least, the Testemonial Will of your Parents, this will eye repeat will be a bitch session after both parents have departed if you have sister in laws. Enough said here.
My wife (Greek) and I had both decided not to accept material things they had promised us, apart from the love they gave us in bringing us up as children and supporting us through life.
My children / wife and I gave the Unconditional Love in return as we nurtured them through the final years of their lives whislt living with us.
Till this day we have yet hear a thankyou from anyone.
My appologies if i have upset you with my comments,
however sometimes you need to cruel to be kind, both our parents were from the so called old school and we were brought up the same in traditions / beliefs / hospitality / nature and above all:
Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind.
The truth will set you free, but first it will make you miserable.
You can always tell a real friend:
when you've made a fool of yourself he doesn't feel you've done a permanent job.
Many fall in love because they say their heart tells them its the person, but your heart can fail you. The devil plays with our hearts, but best to have a strong mind and use it before you allow your heart to fall. Ask yourself, is this person worth the heartache? Is this relationship real? Ask advice too to family but not necessarily friends. No matter how close you are to friends, they can fail you or can have a little jealousy. Ask God for guidance in your prayers as you get involved and ask him before you deeply fall into a trap. God is the doctor of our soul and he will guide every move if you trust him. I believe and I have taken simata from God as signs of go for it or don't. In my case obviously don't or else I would have married and divorced by now. Good luck to everyone my prayers to all of you!!
Personally I would never marry a Greek. I'm a too much of a proud & stuck up Greek and I honor my ancestors, however for even the most liberal person who wants to give a kseno a chance, I don't believe its going to work in the long run either. In the beginning its fun to exchange differences,but in the long run it will get boring or the spark of the fun of that exchange in culture will fade. Their maybe discussion about religion conversion and/or other factors that will clash and when the kids come, you may want to raise it orthodox, he may want to raise it with his own and the problems begin. I would never take that change and I rather save my self from that heartache. Its not my parents who force me to marry Greek or threaten me, its me. My parents will not live forever, but I will be alone in my problems if I go against my upbringing. : (
Marry a Greek!!!!! End it before you have problems. If you marry a Greek and it doesn't work out, he was not the one, but keep trying, Their are many Greek fish out there!!!!!!!!!
Just butting in :) I have been married to a non- Greek for 11 years. We haven't had any problems whatsoever in regards to cultural clash. In fact, my husband has embraced the Greek culture so much it is scarry lol.
My husband actually writesa blog called "A xenos view" if you ever feel like checking it out:
COPY OF MY ESSAY I WON ON WORLD SINGLES CONTEST AND GOT A MONTH FREE MEMBERSHIP.
Relationships only work when two people have a mutual agreement and have excellent communication in order to go forward. I believe that most relationships last if they wait much later in the relationship for physical pleasure. Physical Pleasure can blind a meaningful positive bond between two people. It seems to me that its more beneficial to wait and feel secure about each others goals and interests before pursuing into something deeper and before anyone gets hurt. Open discussion about various topics that are important to each individual not only now but for later is very vital. Couples should no only discuss about themselves in a physical manner, but how they can relate to each other in the future. The Future is very important to discuss if there is to be a life time commitment. A couple should examine each other's strengths and weaknesses. so one is always ready to help the other.
A relationship should grow stronger with an optiimistic point of view. Life is tough and it has hurdles to get over and walls to climb, but a couple should not give up!! They have to fight hard to heal any wounds or battle and solve their problems. For those who wish to have children, they must be very patient and understanding that having children is a greater responibility than most comprehend. Most couples only think one hears of divorce. That shows a couples irresponsibility to life's commitment. A commitment of vows should not be broken for an everlasting life together. I would like to add about the vows each tell each other in matrimony which means so much that people literally must trust themselves and they certainly owe it to all the hearts and souls they touch in their life time. This is a responsibility and a witness to God and all that are present now at the wedding day and throughout their life.
I would like to conclude what we all must do to stop or slow down the divorce rate. Couples have to educate themselves about the true and only way to survive a relationship. That is to be responsible and understanding of the word SACRIFICE
For dating I understand you, enough girls nowadays have become whores or just say stupid things that turn men off as well as some woman. Like the other day I heard a woman trying to teach a parrot to say a nasty word. Excuse my language she said "malaka" but maybe you as many men are not looking in the right places. Ask other men from good families to meet someone. I don't always like being set up, but sometimes its the best and safest option. For men too, don't be soft and accept anything because your afraid of your age or not finding anyone. Its best to find the right partner or no partner then spend your life in misery or feel locked up in a unhappy marriage which you will land up divorced. My brother said, " If she is not what I want, I will not waste my time".
me too I rather not get married then marry just anyone. many tin patane asxima. One guy in Astoria married a woman who all of Astoria had her. This is from the gossip I hear how men talk. So don't let that happen to you. Be a man!!!!!
I love people, but when it comes to marriage, Love is not just love its ethnicity I OWE IT TO MY ANCESTORS 4 DYING TO PRESERVE OUR BLOOD so it doesn't lose its PURITY!!. I love speaking my language, I love my religion, including the pride of our beautiful ancient religion even though it was a mythological.